

I feel strongly that this is who I am sexually and my sexual desires are not something I can change. She is adamant about monogamy, while I want to be monogamish. I like sex to be kinky, and she likes it vanilla. However, our sex life could be a whole lot better. We’re both 29 and are in the process of creating a future together: We live together, we have a great social life, we adopted a dog. My girlfriend and I have been togeth er for about 18 months. Pretend to be shocked when he finally comes out to you – there might be a necklace in it for you – and then get busy setting up your first MMF threesome. But even if your boyfriend never has sex with a man, CAC, even if it takes him years to drop the “totally straight” line, you should go ahead and accept the fact that your boyfriend is bisexual. But since the data shows that monosexuals are bad at monogamy – the data says bisexuals are, too – I’m not sure why I’m required to say that or how it’s supposed to be comforting.

Your boyfriend isn’t “secretly gay,” CAC, he’s “actually bisexual.” You know, like he said he was – or said he might be (but totally is) – in that email exchange you found.Īt this point, I’m required to tell you that bisexuals are just as capable of honouring monogamous commitments as monosexuals, i.e., gays, lesbians and breeders. You also discovered an ad your boyfriend posted to Craigslist where he said he wasn’t sure if he was bi or straight, a discovery that created a crisis in your relationship, a crisis that was resolved with a strap-on dildo and a diamond bracelet. Let’s review the facts: Your boyfriend digs your tits, cuddling you makes him hard and he loves eating your pussy. Should I leave it alone? Is my boyfriend secretly gay? He doesn’t like to talk about the Craigslist incident and gets upset when I bring it up. He eats me out and initiates sex as often as I do. A couple of months have passed and things are great, but I still feel bothered. He bought me a diamond bracelet as an apology and promised never to fuck up again. We then went to a sex shop and bought a strap-on dildo for me to use on him, which we both really enjoy. After the dust settled, he told me he never wanted to lose me. He explained it was just a fantasy he had, he’s totally straight and he was never planning on going through with it. Then I saw he posted an ad on Craigslist under “men seeking men.” He responded to one person, saying he wasn’t sure if he was straight or bi, but he had a car and could drive over! The guy responded saying how about tonight, and my BF never responded to him. I snooped through his browser history (not my proudest moment) and found he was looking at pictures of naked men. When I noticed my boyfriend wanted his ass played with and liked being submissive, I couldn’t help but wonder if something more was going on. My BF and I have been dating for two years. Anyone who’s been reading my column for as long as he’s been interested in sex knows that I’m not always right. In the meantime, SHOTDOWN, enjoy the amazing vanilla sex for as long as it lasts – which could be forever. If two people are together for a time, if they enjoy each other’s company (and genitals), if they part amicably and always remember each other fondly and/or remain friends, their relationship can be counted as a success – even if both parties get out of it alive and go on to form new relationships. While most people would define that as a “failed relationship,” anyone who’s been reading my column for as long as he’s been interested in sex can tell you that I don’t define failure that way. What I mean is this: You’ll probably be together for another year or two before parting ways. I don’t mean this relationship is doomed to fail. Either you’re bad at everything you’ve attempted other than missionary, SHOTDOWN, or she has a very limited sexual repertoire and/or actual physical limitations or health issues she hasn’t divulged to you.Ĭonsidering the age difference here, and considering that this is a post-divorce rebound relationship for you both, the odds are stacked against anything long-term. She wants you to be in control and switch it up but doesn’t want to do any of the things you suggest when you take control and attempt to switch things up. She Hates Options Totally, Desires One Way Now
